Words| Dear Charlotte

Dear charlotte,

Today the sky  is blue  without a cloud insight , the sun is bright, the ocean is a glorious blend of green and blue , the waves are  so calm and gentle they  slowly fade into the white sand creating a breathe taking collision of beauty. a testament to the greatest artist known to man. It’s like the perfect   song to a  beautiful day .simply ironic.

I once read a book with a rather tragic end but what made it memorable is the writer’s choice to end with a very peculiar phrase  … “To die you must live first”.

 Though young I have  no shred of doubt that I have  lived  .Before I met you I had hoped only to belong but in you I found much more, I found a home .you my dear charlotte welcomed me with an open heart and taught me how to love. You made  me feel invincible, unstoppable, even the wildest storm seemed calm with you in my arms. In your eyes ,your beautiful brown eyes I saw the universe and in your arms I found joy. 

I remember you lying in the fields reading your favorite poem with a voice clear as day.

My perfect shot with my rose right in the middle.

“Ssshhh!  my loud heart , silence! echo not in repeat. Relieve my twisted gut

I ask of you this one treat

Breathe slow my lungs 

Not to take in all the smoke

From the burning firery  fungs

A relentless screech of mock

Release me am slowly drowning

In every breathe I take

A trap of my own doing

Heaven and hell in one make”


The day you left my dear charlotte , I crashed. Becoming a wreck that couldn’t  be salvaged. I know not when my sky turned grey, was it when tears  flooded my eyes as I watched you fade into the shadows ? Or when my heart was  breaking in pieces  as I said goodbye? .I simply can’t tell. all I know for sure is that my world fell apart.

I did ask you once

If Would you  be my shield my  shelter  If you would  fight for me with you last breathe 

I guess I know the answer now.

Was it all in my head? Maybe, but this not me condemning you to a life of guilt but a letter of gratitude for giving me something that is timeless

 fate was cruel and  I simply refuse to live in a world where you and I no  longer exist. The air is becoming thin with every breath.  I am forgetting how  to breath I fear my end beckons yet am at peace , ready to embrace nothing. i must leave curtains closing but as I take a glance at my life, I smile because you,  my dear charlotte in your embrace I lived.



Yours always


by Grace Irungu.


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